“Documentary Now” is a satirical television series that parodies famous documentaries. Created by Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, Seth Meyers, and Rhys Thomas, the show first premiered in 2015. Each episode is a standalone mockumentary, paying homage to renowned documentaries such as “Grey Gardens,” “Nanook of the North,” and “The Thin Blue Line.”
Documentary Now Quotes
1- Arturo : Every banana we inspect up close. How it feels. How it looks in the light. How it sounds.
2- Bill Dawes : My favorite was Wayne’s signature heliumtopic meditation. Once a week, members would suck on helium and then admit what they were most ashamed of.
3- Jerry Wallach : I needed to get smart, wisen up, kick the stupid out of my brain and rev the Corvette.
4- Izabella Barta : You know, so if the audience thinks that I’m sad or fragile or emotional, it’s because I want them to think that.
5- Trevor Kenney : I went to the Ukraine. They buried me up to my neck and dudes took turns hitting me in the head with a golf club. And I was fine there.
6- Ra-Sharir :Maybe I would have been nicer to the townspeople had they not been so fat and stupid.
7- Larry Cooper : These people thought they were on a path to enlightenment. And unbeknownst to them, they were dressed like a bunch of drunks at a tailgate.
8- Dimo : There is no courage in offending unless you are also willing to offend those you love.
9- Izabella Barta : Art is not supposed to be safe. It’s supposed to be radical.
10- Izabella Barta : You know, if you’re a woman working in the arts, or anywhere actually, people always think you are being controlled. But I’ve always had control.
11- Jerry Wallach : The future looked as good as a blonde with long, flat buttocks
12- Jerry Wallach : She was like whipped cream and whiskey. Fluffy, and God damn dangerous. She had just the right va-va-voom to play a Holocaust survivor.
13- Bill Dawes : A hypnotist with pink eye is like a boxer with two broken hands.
14- Dimo : My core goal as an artist is to deconstruct the idea of working, of effort because we are raised to believe that great works of art require suffering
15- Father Ra-Shawbard : Breath is the answer to everything.
16- Kyle Riley : But let’s take a look at these bananas. These are just natural, not yellow, you know, chemicals, not brought to you by Tide. It’s just like a regular banana, and that’s the simple life that we kind of forget about, you know?
17- Izabella Barta : Artist must be warrior.
18- Arturo : The coffee, every bean, is it your friend or enemy
19- Diego : We have every kind of salsa. We have teriyaki. We have barbecue. We have peanut butter. Ranch dressing, that’s important.
20- Izabella Barta : I’ve always known exactly what I want and exactly how to get it.
21- Marge Middleton : This is America. You cannot open a juice bar in a muffler shop
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