Discover the top 46 insightful and humorous quotes from Jessica Huang, the beloved character from the TV show “Fresh Off the Boat.” Get inspired and entertained by her witty and relatable words.
Jessica Huang Quotes
1- “If you get lost, try to find a white family. You will be safe there until I can find you.” – Jessica Huang
2- “I mean look at this calligraphy. It could have come straight from the Vatican.” – Jessica Huang
3- “Yes, all those white people sound like they’re making lots of mistakes.” – Jessica Huang
4- “Fun-fact, I’m good at everything I do.” – Jessica Huang
5- “You know what gives me nightmares. Our bank account. Stephen King should publish my checkbook.” – Jessica Huang
6- “If we get separated, try and join a white family. You will be safe there until I can find you.” – Jessica Huang
7- “Eddie! That’s very expensive. If you want to waste something, you waste water. Do not throw juice.” – Jessica Huang
8- “Children are never too old to be controlled. It’s just like chess, children are the pawns and you are the queen.” – Jessica Huang
9- “Eddie stop acting weird.” – Jessica Huang
10- “I’m gonna treat myself to a pedicure done by a white lady. That’s when you know you’ve made it.” – Jessica Huang
11- “That’s my Tiger Shirt! You stole it from my bag.” – Jessica Huang
12- “Louis, stop mumbling. Say words or don’t say words.” – Jessica Huang
13- “Only if there’s something with Denzel. Movie theaters are a hot bed for disease.” – Jessica Huang
14- “Boys, what are you? Waitresses at a small town diner? Stop chatting.” – Jessica Huang
15- “At my family’s furniture store, I handled employee grievances.” – Jessica Huang
16- “Super Mario – Italian Maintenance Twins.” – Jessica Huang
17- “Thank god, thank god. I knew you’d get it.” – Jessica Huang
18- “Colonial Americans were like the Chinese of today – their struggle, their work ethic, their ability to use every single part of the buffalo.” – Jessica Huang
19- “Come on, I’ll show you the Miller house. Let me just get my kids. Come on! Marco!” – Jessica Huang
20- “Field trips are just paid vacations for teachers. I don’t pay taxes so they can walk around in museum telling our children that a painting of a soup can is beautiful.” – Jessica Huang
21- “Which one says I’m rich enough to be invited but not rich enough that you can ask me to donate money?” – Jessica Huang
22- “Stop playing invalid and get dressed!” – Jessica Huang
23- “Are you kidding? We stuck it to a rich guy. It’s just like Caddy Shack.” – Jessica Huang
24- “I’m supposed to be visionary. I’m supposed to be Oprah.” – Jessica Huang
25- “And we have been invited to the chamber of commerce charity fundraising event. It’s in a country club!” – Jessica Huang
26- “Let him go! He’s afraid to cross the street by himself.” – Jessica Huang
27- “Have fun. Everything waist-down is your territory. I made that very clear in our vows.” – Jessica Huang
28- “They (lice) are the pedophiles of the insect world.” – Jessica Huang
29- “It sounds like you’re going on a ton of trips, on the “complain train.” – Jessica Huang
30- “They’re worse than goldfish, Louis. They’re catfish, the garbagemen of the lake!” – Jessica Huang
31- “It’s like all my powers have been drained to fuel my rage.” – Jessica Huang
32- “Flight attendants don’t even get seats on the plane. They walk back and forth pushing a cart. They’re the homeless of the sky.” – Jessica Huang
33- “Louis, you know you shouldn’t undress when you’re upset.” – Jessica Huang
34- “He’s a leech, Louis. Like a barnacle. Or a leech.” – Jessica Huang
35- “The woman who thinks Lex Luther is the superhero of Superman?” – Jessica Huang
36- “I just took a nap right now, while you were talking.” – Jessica Huang
37- “Don’t ever weaponize Amy Grant again.” – Jessica Huang
38- “They’re family, they’re coming to gloat about all of our misfortunes.” – Jessica Huang
39- “Did that ginger bite you and infect your brain?” – Jessica Huang
40- “I don’t have to say ‘I’m sorry’ to him, Louis. I gave birth to him.” – Jessica Huang
41- “Well, if he were a believable sponge he’d be able to sop up his tears.” – Jessica Huang
42- “No one seems to appreciate how good I am at everything I do.” – Jessica Huang
43- “I was right to support you. You are a gardener, you like to plant seeds. Idea seeds. Business seeds.” – Jessica Huang
44- “Why do I want to watch money wilt?” – Jessica Huang
45- “The Wheel takes physical skill, Millionaire is just knowing lots of stuff.” – Jessica Huang
46- “Don’t worry Louis, money isn’t everything.” – Jessica Huang
