Ash vs Evil Dead Quotes: “Ash vs Evil Dead” is an American comedy horror television series created by Sam Raimi, Ivan Raimi, and Tom Spezialy. It is a continuation and sequel to the original “Evil Dead” film series, which began with “The Evil Dead” in 1981. The TV series premiered on Starz on October 31, 2015, and concluded on April 29, 2018, after three seasons.
The show stars Bruce Campbell as Ashley J. “Ash” Williams, reprising his iconic role from the original films. Ash is a middle-aged, chainsaw-wielding, shotgun-toting, and somewhat bumbling hero who finds himself once again battling the demonic Deadites that were unleashed by the Necronomicon Ex-Mortis, an ancient and evil book of the dead.
Ash vs Evil Dead Quotes
Kelly Maxwell : There’s one thing I learned from Ash. Shoot first, ask questions never.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : With all due respect, your tiny brain is a lot safer without my problems inside it.
Pablo Simon Bolivar : You fought this thing before. Maybe you just got to finish what you started.
Kelly Maxwell : One false move, and I will Second Amendment your brains all over this truck.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Trust me, once you get jacked in the face, it’ll all click. I can’t even get my nut up to rumble unless I’ve had a good shot to the chin.
Pablo Simon Bolivar : You can’t outrun evil, Ash!
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : When you get back to Hell, work on your aim.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : First thing I got to do is see a guy about a book. Must be some spell I can say to undo all this. The other first thing I got to do is some cardio, ’cause my heart is jackhammering like a quarterback on prom night.
Kelly Maxwell : Everyone in this world is plagued by something evil.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Well Pop, I guess it’s time to ride the pale horse, up to the discount hardware store in the sky.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : You’re the one who grew up your entire life looking for that book, and you never found it. Me on the other hand, I can’t fart without tripping over that thing. And I fart a lot.
Kelly Maxwell : We’re not leaving a trail of blood and guts behind us, we’re keeping Michigan moist.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Whoa, I got two hands! Brujo, I need two beers!
Kelly Maxwell : Hey, I’m looking for a friend. He’s, uh, tall, dumb, smells like… bread. Um, oh yeah, chainsaw arm. Probably should’ve, led with that one, but…
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : What’s out there knows that you’re alive, and it wants you to be… un-alive.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : You know, I was gonna take that propane and blow the doors off, but I’ll happily blow your doors off first.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : She shouldn’t be alone right now. Plus, you’re kinda like a young me. Deadites ruined your life and you’re hot as hell.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Last time I was here with a girl, I was hopin’ to get laid. Didn’t quite work out that way. I did cut my own hand off with a chainsaw, though. It was a fun weekend
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Someone needs to wash your mouth out, kid. And that someone is me.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : If you live in the past, you hurt the future.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : This ain’t a charity. What we’re up against only understands one thing.
Ruby : Do you know what evil is, Kelly? It’s power without fear, without guilt, and without pain.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : All roads to destroying this evil lead right back to where it all began. The cabin
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Well, good news I found a piece of pie with no blood on it. Anybody want a bite?
Ruby : I’ve learned you can always make things more painful.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Hey, good looking. You here to break me out or break me in?
Ruby : Without good, there is no evil.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Ladies, I’m gonna be honest with you, I’m not drunk enough to know if this is good-weird or bad-weird. But I’ll get there though.
“Oh you stop right there sugar lips, the last time we made a deal I got jack shit out of it okay?”
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Once again I saved the world. Now it’s time to get the girl.
Kelly Maxwell : Is there any world, where this doesn’t have something to do with Ash?
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : We gave peace a chance. Now it’s time for war.
Pablo Simon Bolivar : Ash, If I was a Deadite, I would be honored to have you chop my head off.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : If you snag a little fish, you’re not gonna eat it. No, you use it as a bait fish, to catch the whale.
Ash: I’m sorry I let you down Kiddo. But I promise you this: if you’re still out there somewhere, I’ll bring you home.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Sometimes the whale needs his bait fish to remind him of where he is in the ocean. Or somethin’ like that.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Meet me in the men’s room in three minutes. But I gotta warn you, you’re gonna want to leave your husband for me, and I can’t let that happen. Family values.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : I’ve always wanted to spend time in the city so nice, they named it Jacksonville.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Hey, uh, Brujo, thanks for the opinion, appreciate it. Now you can take it, turn it sideways, shove it right up the old poop chute.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Yes, I’m upset. Yes, I’m behind the wheel. Yes, I’m drunk. And maybe my license isn’t the fancy kind from the DMV. But at least I’m drunk!
Kelly Maxwell : If I’ve learned anything from you, Ash, it’s that if something seems too good to be true, it probably is.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Everybody dies here. It’s just a rule. Death, taxes, more death. And I don’t pay taxes, so all I know is death.
Ruby: Sometimes what you think you saw, it’s exactly what you saw.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Now I’m gonna kill you, just like I killed your father! I didn’t really kill your father, that just kinda sounded cool.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : Pablo, I hope your weird Brujo uncle can help us out, ’cause me no likey bein’ responsible for everything bad.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : I told you. A good shot to the face always gets the juices flowin’.
Kelly Maxwell : We all waste time. Important thing is, when we decide to stop.
Ashley ‘Ash’ J. Williams : My name is Ash Williams. I’m a hero from the future. I’m here to save the world from evil. Again.
