Ralph Wiggum Quotes: Ralph Wiggum is a fictional character on the animated television series “The Simpsons.” He is a student at Springfield Elementary School and is known for his childlike innocence, naivety, and hilarious, often nonsensical, statements.
Ralph is depicted as the son of Chief Wiggum, the bumbling and often clueless Chief of Police in Springfield. Despite his father’s occupation, Ralph is not known for being particularly smart or perceptive. Instead, he is portrayed as a well-meaning, but eccentric and dim-witted child.
Ralph Wiggum Quotes
1. “Why do people run away from me?” – Ralph Wiggum.
2. “The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there.” – Ralph Wiggum.
3. “Martin Luther King had a dream. Dreams are where Elmo and Toy Story had a party and I was invited. Yay! My turn is over!” – Ralph Wiggum.
4. “Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulders.” – Ralph Wiggum.
5. “In 50 years, the vacuum cleaner will be quiet and not scary.” – Ralph Wiggum.
6. “Was President Lincoln okay?” – Ralph Wiggum.
7. “I wanna go back in mommy!” – Ralph Wiggum.
8. “And the doctor told me that both my eyes were lazy, and that’s why it was the best summer ever.”– Ralph Wiggum.
9. “Me fail English…That’s unpossible.” – Ralph Wiggum.
10. “I’m a Star Wars.” – Ralph Wiggum.
11. “It tastes like…burning.”– Ralph Wiggum.
12. “My grandma had hair like that when she went to sleep in her forever box.” – Ralph Wiggum.
13. “Clouds are God’s sneezes!” – Ralph Wiggum.
14. “Daddy, I’m scared. Too scared to wet my pants.” – Ralph Wiggum.
15. “Candles taste like burning.” – Ralph Wiggum.
16. “Dear Miss Hoover, you have Lyme disease. We miss you. Kevin is biting me. Come back soon. Here’s a drawing of a spirokeet. Love Ralph.” – Ralph Wiggum.
17. “Wait, mister. You’re drinking a candle. You don’t want wax in your mouth, do you?” – Ralph Wiggum.
18. “Lisa’s bad dancing makes my feet sad.” – Ralph Wiggum.
19. “And I want a bike and a monkey and a friend for the monkey.” – Ralph Wiggum.
20. “Look Big Daddy, it’s regular Daddy.” – Ralph Wiggum.
21. “When I grow up, I want to be a principal, or a caterpillar!” – Ralph Wiggum.
22. “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.” – Ralph Wiggum.
23. “That’s where I saw the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things.” – Ralph Wiggum.
24. “This is my swing set. This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end.” – Ralph Wiggum.
25. “My daddy’s gonna put you in jail.” – Ralph Wiggum.
26. “Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers, I’m learneding.” – Ralph Wiggum.
27. “I’m wearing a bathrobe, and I’m not even sick.” – Ralph Wiggum.
28. “Do alligators alligate?” – Ralph Wiggum.
29. “If mommy’s purse didn’t belong in the microwave, why did it fit?” – Ralph Wiggum.
30. “All of my friends have birthdays this year!” – Ralph Wiggum.
31. “I drink blue juice from under the sink!” – Ralph Wiggum.
32. “I’m in danger.” – Ralph Wiggum.
33. “Slow down, Bart! My legs don’t know how to be as long as yours.” – Ralph Wiggum.
34. “Fireworks make my ears yell!” – Ralph Wiggum.
35. “I cheated wrong. I copied the Lisa name and used the Ralph answers.” – Ralph Wiggum.
